How to Make a New Friend
I. How to Make a New Friend
Our world is cluttered with tidbits of this and that. Some are pointy. Some are shiny. Some feel rough to the touch. Although I don’t know a whole lot, I do know this: life’s various material morsels pale in comparison to a delightful friend.
Below (☟) you will find tips, tricks, and tactics to meet new friends.
When you walk down your favorite street, you probably notice a steady stream of passerby. I bet some of them look quite hip and some of them might seem a bit unsavory. Lesson 1: Even if someone doesn’t look like a magazine model, it doesn’t mean they’re not worth talking to. Magazines are glossy and brimming with advertisements for a reason. Lesson 2: Everyone has a story, and it’s entirely as interesting as yours.
With that in mind, how do you begin meeting these potential new friends? I’ll be honest: it takes plenty of practice and can be quite scary. In fact, sometimes your heart will beat as fast as a drumroll and your palms will cry with anxiety. Lesson 3: As a general rule of thumb, the scary stuff is the stuff worth doing.
It’s important to be nice. And polite. And yourself. These are crucial ingredients to relationships that last. For the most part, strangers can feel hot air upon their cheeks, and it tends to burn like white fire. Dishonesty creates quicksand- a trap most relationships fail to endure. Lesson 4: Quicksand is a tricky business that oft-times ends poorly.
Here are some tips for your approach:
a.) Find something unique to compliment. Breasts don’t count. Brains do. Additionally, I like necklaces, books, art, or tattoos. Look for something with a fantastic story. Our world rotates upon fantastic stories.
b.) Look into their eyes. Someone once mused that our eyes are the windows to our souls. I can’t confirm this observation, however eye contact does convey genuine interest and sponge-like absorption.
c.) Smile. Even on a grey winter’s day, a sunny set of teeth will brighten a stranger’s day. Just make sure you don’t have carrots in the avenues between your molars.
Of course, sometimes you will be issued a wave of dismissal or an eyeful of exasperation. Not everyone is looking to meet a new amigo. Maybe-just maybe- they had just found gum on their brand new shoes. Perhaps they’re late for an important meeting with a no-nonsense client. It is essential that you give these strangers the benefit of the doubt. Everyone has a bad day once in a while and sometimes privacy is desired.
With all of this in mind, I hope you explore the possibility of meeting new friends. As I’m sure you know, human beings are endlessly interesting and thoroughly beautiful. They are worth your nervous effort, and you are worth theirs.
II. Addendum: A Culinary Supplemental
Now that we’ve covered the basics, how do you nurture a newly established friendship? I’ve found that food and drink are healthy drivers for laughter, reflection, and ideation. Allow me to explain:
In a world with fast-moving objects and an intensely digital focus, it can be difficult to simply speak with a fleshy human being. A meal among friends or family is a delectable solution to the issue at hand.
A well-prepared meal has the binding power of sticky adhesive and the happy therapy of nutrition. It’s a physical exercise in self-expression and communication. You are in concert with farmer, chef, server, and companion alike.
Of course, if you prepare a surgically precise meal or carefully constructed cocktail, you know that it is process-driven. It is an exercise in patience, creativity, and love. You are making conscious decisions about the food’s working anatomy, the meal’s purpose (dietary, pleasure, nutrition, cultural), and the preferences of your lucky recipients.
Once you’ve hooked your new friend, I highly encourage injecting food into the mix. Preparing and/or sharing food is a profoundly intimate experience that promotes conversation and communion, energized thought, and life’s simple enjoyments.
A pleasant starting point is a cozy café. Good luck!
*A little piece I wrote for Good Eggs LA